An Introduction.

25 Jan

Inspired by a great pal of mine who recently achieved her amazing goal weight by losing over a HUNDRED FREAKIN’ POUNDS, I decided I needed something to hold me accountable in my own struggle with being a cow.  So, voila.  Internet world, welcome.  I love the Internet. The entertainment, the informational access, the bullshit, the stupidity…it’s all great.

Greatest of all, is the anonymity. Unless you’ve been granted special permission to read this which means you’re a very dear friend, you don’t know me, and I can tell everybody nothing and nobody everything, all at once.  My deep dark secrets about body image, and the shame and guilt of binge-eating and dancing badly in front of mirrors, and the very real physics of numerical values representing the amount of mass I contribute to Earth’s gravitational pull — these are the gifts I bring to you, everyone who is a stranger, and I’m totally okay with that, because, really, who are you, anyway? Who cares?

Another super thing about this medium serving as a system of accountability: As someone once said, “You can’t take something off the Internet – it’s like taking pee out of a pool.” If I put anything here — edit/delete buttons be damned — someone, somewhere, can access it. It’s like drunken Facebook photos I tried to delete but I know are still hanging out in some binary bachelor pad in the Internet ether, waiting to get me into trouble. Every post becomes a permanent artifact, a public record of world history that pertains to my (albeit anonymous) fat ass.  I don’t want my digital dieting legacy to be incomplete, so regular check-ins are imperative.  Also, this is just a way of mentioning an issue that should probably be explored in a future post: perfectionism and how it screws up goals for success.

So basically, fear of dying young will motivate me to lose weight and forcing myself into a self-constructed inflexible system of accountability will motivate me to keep on doing it.  Sounds healthy already.  This will be fun.

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One Response to “An Introduction.”

  1. shannon.anders January 27, 2011 at 7:01 am #

    You are a dork. And I love you.

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